The biscuit that broke our hearts and our teeth

This morning we had a biscuit snack

That came out of a Swedish flat pack

And like most of the products of Ikea

How to open the wrap wasn’t clear.

Once inside all that we found

Was a Scandinavian scam

Kakor Hallon is nothing more than

A biscuit sandwich filled with jam.

This pastry usurper

This bakery imposter

This dicky dodger

This Scandi Scam

Is no more than a crumbling sham.

But the extent of the biscuit’s shortfall

Is matched by the quality of the famous meatball

P.S. We liked them really

The cream especially.

Biscuit: Kakor Hallon
Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: 80p from Ikea in Southampton