Newly Minted

The new pound coin produced by the Royal Mint
Has a bronze metallic hologram-style glint
And will stop the forgers making us skint.
Roast lamb with rosemary and mint
Will make our eyes sparkle and glint
Unless we’re short of cash and skint


Most of us have a favourite mint.
Katie likes a polo from her pocket stuck with lint.
Shan loves choc chip ices with a hint
Of green, hot and cool peppermint.
Jen’s favourite is not even a mint but Swiss Lindt.
Perhaps she’s offering an Easter hint.


Katie has a new hat, green as mint,
Shaped like a brain, with a bluish tint,
Bought in Ikea to make us squint.
Jamie has new glasses, their condition mint,
Anti-glare, with a photo-reactive tint,
So in sunlight he need not squint.


Paul likes Matchmakers and almost any other mint.
You can stick them to your fingers and make them sprint
But because they melt they’re no use as a splint.
All of us will relish a cool glacier mint
After a long day and an Olympic sprint.
‘At night’, Paul tells us, ‘I wear a splint.’


Dave arriving late, cholesterol high, should take the doctor’s hint,
study hard the medicinal small print
and drink his tea in litres laced with mint.
Mint Chocolate Rounds from Lidl
With silver in the middle,
Like the new one pound,
But round.

Biscuit: Mint Chocolate Rounds,
Taste test: 8.5 out of 10
Cost: From Lidl in Totton - cheap!