Each poet contributed two words in return for a biscuit and then we tried to make some sort of poem from them. As you will see, it proved tricky.
Lorna was one of our dedicated and much-valued volunteers.
Last week we lost lovely Lorna
Who returned to Devon,
At least for a while,
But left this crunchy taste of heaven.
Last week too Jose Mourinho,
Lost his special wolfish smile
And now looks like an anorexic hippo.
Last week too neither West Ham
Nor our very own Southam-
-pton lost their even match.
Neither Lambert nor Noble
Proved the least bit able
To score a goal from scratch.
We are at a loss how to include
Such words as ignition, prelude
Thank you, Jamie, for such exhibitionism.
Anita too is love-lorn and lost,
With Backstreet Boys star-crossed,
AlthoughTerry doesn’t give a toss.
The Intercity Firm belong among the lost
Now Sam Allardyce is their boss,
And Jon and Olly also are quite cross.
As poets we are altogether at a loss
How to mend and end this verse
So what if we arrange a return
For one muddy hippopotamus,
Brown and ready for the circus,
Or maybe we should just crash and burn.
But now it’s really time to cease
And for this restless poem to rest in peace.
So thank you, Lorna, for choosing to donate
This marvellous, honeycomb chocolate.