Tuesday 25 April 2017

A Weird World





The world has turned weird.
Everyone’s growing a beard.
The world has turned weird
And it’s worse than we feared.
The world has turned weird.
Trump, the new messiah has appeared
The world has turned weird.
Way off course it’s careered.
Once presidents persuaded and steered.
Now they’re sneered at and jeered.
Politician’s names are smeared
As to their claims they have not adhered.
The world has turned weird.
Common sense has disappeared.
The world has turned weird,
Upside down and North Koreaed.
It’s so sad that we’re reduced to a sneer.
So much better if we learned to love and not to fear.

Marlene’s Clotted Cream
Shortbread from Exmouth


Tuesday 18 April 2017

The Nuclear Option




These Chinese biscuits are green and nuclear
They are a fitting snack
When the future is so unclear

USA and North Korea stop playing on our atomic fear
it feels like the end of the world is drawing near

The two leaders, Trump and Kim Jong Un
need to compromise and get on
to find a peaceful solution

North Korean activist Park Yeong-Mi
is speaking up bravely for the world to see
she's urging China to put on pressure and authority
and to stop turning back scared refugees

Please act now before it ends in catastrophe
and we see the outbreak of World War III

Biscuit: Jasmine and Oolong Tea Cookies
Taste test: 6 out of 10
Cost: Gift from China

Friday 7 April 2017

Newly Minted




The new pound coin produced by the Royal Mint
Has a bronze metallic hologram-style glint
And will stop the forgers making us skint.
Roast lamb with rosemary and mint
Will make our eyes sparkle and glint
Unless we’re short of cash and skint


Most of us have a favourite mint.
Katie likes a polo from her pocket stuck with lint.
Shan loves choc chip ices with a hint
Of green, hot and cool peppermint.
Jen’s favourite is not even a mint but Swiss Lindt.
Perhaps she’s offering an Easter hint.


Katie has a new hat, green as mint,
Shaped like a brain, with a bluish tint,
Bought in Ikea to make us squint.
Jamie has new glasses, their condition mint,
Anti-glare, with a photo-reactive tint,
So in sunlight he need not squint.


Paul likes Matchmakers and almost any other mint.
You can stick them to your fingers and make them sprint
But because they melt they’re no use as a splint.
All of us will relish a cool glacier mint
After a long day and an Olympic sprint.
‘At night’, Paul tells us, ‘I wear a splint.’


Dave arriving late, cholesterol high, should take the doctor’s hint,
study hard the medicinal small print
and drink his tea in litres laced with mint.
Mint Chocolate Rounds from Lidl
With silver in the middle,
Like the new one pound,
But round.

Biscuit: Mint Chocolate Rounds,
Taste test: 8.5 out of 10
Cost: From Lidl in Totton - cheap!