Tuesday, 31 October 2017

Scared? Who's scared?!

It's All Hallow's Eve
We're being watched by the Evil Eye
At midnight the witches swoop by
Tonight's the night when vampire bats fly

Skeletons rise creakily from their ancient graves
and articulate their bones
Zombies fight to grapple
for a sticky toffee apple

Sugar fuelled children roam the streets
dressed up for trick or treat
desperate for sweets
egg his door - shriek!

Mummies and Daddies
make pumpkins jump out of their skins
spiders are busy cobwebbing
whilst people are apple bobbing
Bolt the door and watch the Blue Planet II

Biscuits: Nairn's Dark Chocolate Chip
Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: £1.35 from Waitrose in Lymington

Tuesday, 17 October 2017

Ophelia's Storm in a Teacup with Biscuits

As the Saharan storm winds blew
The skies turned an eerie yellow hue
In Ireland they had a tempestuous breeze
That lifted seas and uprooted trees

The effects on the landscape
and scenery were disastrous
the results of climate change
are tumultuous

If  you are a global warming
The sight may have been

If it was the end of the world
the earth would tremble
The underworld it would

However in true British style
it was grim for a couple of hours
shortly followed
by sun and showers

Biscuits: Fox's Fabulous Selection
Taste test: 9.2 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Martyn

Tuesday, 10 October 2017


Should they go or should they stay?
The world is falling to pieces
Like these biscuits that are broken
And the promises that politicians have spoken

Tribal drums are beating
Leaving populations seething.
The rush for globalisation
Has produced more fragmentation.

In Majorca and Venice
They protest against tourism’s menace.
Tear gas and rubber bullets in the blazing sun
Are not the way to prevent a referendum.

The voice of the Kurds is still not heard
Although their cause is not absurd.
Myanmar is in a state
As Rohingya Moslems flee their fate.

Nationalism may be a blessing or a curse
But violence only makes things worse.

The last of last week’s broken biscuits
Helped us make this verse.

Biscuits: The last of the Box of Broken Biscuits
Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: A gift