Scentimental

I love the smell of oranges in the morning
it's very appealing and sends my senses reeling

Jegan prefers the smell of sherry in the evening
it gets him merry and sends him reeling

Lee likes the smell of an open window at dusk
it's a raw resuscitation to his next inhalation

Karl remembers the smell of dying embers
from the fire that burned all through the night

Mandy is driven crazy by the smell of Jalfrezi
her sinuses are stricken by the spices and chicken

Brian's memories are triggered
by the reek of spent gunpowder
Oh deer he missed

Ollie has a tear in  his eye
when he sniffs the spice of his stir-fry
the ginger, garlic and chilli
make him all excited and silly

Lee B enjoys the scent of cinnamon
baked into his Mum's apple pie
you may ask why
because it's bloody lovely!

Biscuit: Loacker Wafers (they smell lovely!)

Taste test: 9 out of 10
Cost: 99p in Holland and Barrett, Lymington

Right to be Rude

These biscuits made us
question what is meant by rude
Distasteful, inappropriate, disgusting,
obscene or just plain crude.

Are you glad that page 3
is now bikini clad,
or is it just for your Dad?
Do you lament the decline
of manners,
does it make you want to march
with softly spoken banners?
Do you reminisce
about the yesterdays of Sir and Miss?
Cringe at those who blaspheme,
when their kids shout and scream?
Laugh at racist jokes,
or sympathise with those whom fun pokes?

Should everyone be free to offend,
are you accepting of this current trend?
Our democracy's based on the
principle of free speech.
So who the hell are we to preach?

Biscuit: Rude Health Spelt Oaty

Taste test: 6.5 out of 10 (but are they really biscuits?)
Cost: £2.10 from Waitrose in Lymington

#je suis charlie

charlie was in trouble
extremists burst their bubble
they came under fire
for creating offensive satire
terror tried to silence their illustrative fun
but the pen was mightier than the gun

the liberty terrorists attempted to sever
in reality drew everyone together
millions poured on to the streets
showing solidarity by stamping their feet

the people stood firm in their stance
to uphold the values of france
liberté, égalité, fraternité is what they say
and so charlie hebdo will again be printed today

Biscuit: Aero Biscuits

Taste test: 9.5 out of 10 (but are they really biscuits?)
Cost: £1.69 from Tesco in New Milton

NO New Year's Resolutions

O dear it's New Year
we'll all be another year older
now is the time to be bolder
forget resolutions
we are who we are
stick to your usual plan
and you'll go far

Resolutions pile on the pressure
expectations are set too high
realistic goals are better to try
forget resolutions
we are who we are
embrace yourself
to guarantee inner health

Resist the temptation to crash diet
relax if you want to find lasting peace
and just loosen your belt to find release
forget resolutions
we are who we are
set your sights on Spring
let nature make your heart sing

Biscuit: Dad's Goodie Rings

Taste test: 9.8 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Canada