Jack and the Biscuit Stalk

Off to the market Jack shall go

With his highland cow in tow

But Jack was too late

The market, he missed it

All he could trade Daisy for

Was Snapjack Biscuits

Home he went, feeling quite content

But his old ma she didn't relent

She threw the Snapjacks
 out into the wood

‘We don’t want these,
 they aren't any good’

The very next morning to Jack's surprise

Stood a biscuit stalk that reached the skies

Jack started to climb towards the top

To find the golden honeycomb crop

Maryland was his destination

There he’d find the golden biscuit creation

Jack ambled anxiously along the street

Fearing a giant that he might meet

Walking down that crumbly road

Jack felt the burden of his heavy load

A giant choc chip cookie man blocked his path

Jack so shocked, started to laugh

Then he jumped up quick and chomped his hand

Poor ginormous cookie man looked far less grand

'He tastes so scrumptious in my tum'

thought Jack as he gulped him down in one.

'Who wants Snapjacks from Maryland anyway?

I’d rather have their choc chip cookies any day!'

The morale of the story? Here's the facts 

These awful Snapjacks should be axed

Maryland your choc chip cookies are top notch

Focus on them, not this honeycomb hotch-potch!

Biscuit: Maryland Honeycomb Snapjacks

Taste test: 4 out of 10
Cost:  £1 from Asda in Totton