Our Manifesto

Vote for the only party
that promotes biscuit poetry.

We will increase your slice of the centre
We will give you more than crumbs on your plate.

There'll be no more hobnobbing now
in the corridors of power.

We will add to your benefits
wafers, chocolate fingers and other biscuits.

You'd be crackers to vote for anyone else:
Mr Farage is no more than a mirage
Mr Miliband is impossibly bland
Mr Clegg is cracked and broken like an egg
Mr Cameron and wife Sam just don't give a damn.

We are the icing on the top
the sweet cream of the crop.

Here's a digestive or two
of what we want to do.

Decent housing for the homeless
A living wage and nothing less.

An economy with low carbon emission
Honest and fair taxation.

Living benefits if you cannot work
Affordable public transport.

We think that it's sensible too
to stay within the EU.

The right proportion of our wealth
should be spent on the national health.

but we need money to be there
to provide for social care.

We know as well the hard fact
that the only way to pay is with more tax.

And if then we still need more cash
then Trident we will have to slash.

And extra VAT on biscuits and confectionery
might stop us eating quite so many.


An Election Poem by Jamie

Do I vote to pacify my own needs
or do I become an MP and do the dirty deed,
to take away what some people had
gone forever, that's rather sad.
What happened to 'we are all the same,
we are in this together'?
The cloud has burst
and to dirty weather.

I'd like to see the elderly in peace
to be cared for; looking after their needs.
To have our schools closer to home
so that no child has to roam.
Our workers paid enough money to survive
not needing food banks to stay alive.

My Manifesto by Shan

Keep those millions of quid from being flushed
down the waste loo.
Those developing countries' greedy governments have their own cash
don't give them even more to spend on themselves,
rather than their people.
You could cut the hot air that emits from politicans' mouths
and melt all the ear wax that makes them deaf to most people.
Scrap the FA, ECB, RFU etc etc and replace them
with boards that can actively work for their money.